intermittently
by verity candor
Summary: Something about it being just two voices is unbearably...weird. Two months ago, Jacob would have been thrilled to have Seth's endless talking gone, but really. This sucks.  Blackwater. AU. T for language.


A/N: First off, yes, I wrote a Twilight fanfic. I'm properly embarrassed. To explain the AU, I removed the Renesmee angle by giving Bella a little baby boy. Seeing as Jacob can't reproduce with a vampirical laddie, pedo- I mean, imprinting go byebye. At least according to my research. (Yes, I had to do research.) Seth returned to the La Push pack, like he had initially intended to do after the baby.

Also, Fanfiction butchered my formatting. It was significantly more awesome before.

_-x- -x- -x-_

_**intermittently**__\in-ter-MIT-uhnt-lee\_

_adv._

_in a manner suddenly stopping and starting_

-x-

It's a strange sort of intimacy. Like the universe has tucked in its corners and suddenly folded in on itself. It's too _small_.

-x-

In an exaggerated rebound, they compensate by keeping an unusual amount of distance from one another.

-x-

Something about it being just two voices is unbearably...weird. Two months ago, Jacob would have been thrilled to have Seth's _endless talking_gone, but really.

This sucks.

-x-

After their so-called Pack is formed – in the afterglow of little EJ (Hah. However diplomatic he'd seemed, Edward had NOT been pleased about _Edward_ _Jacob_) clawing out of Bella, and Seth's return to La Push – after their stunted conversations have faded into stillness and their somewhat patrols have become choreographed dances of accidental touches and shying away – after all of that, when they're stuck with it, the hybrid monster that is JacobandLeah'sPack, they finally learn that the best way to avoid the issue is just to keep from phasing.

The issue being the quiet, that is.

The silence.

-x-

They wander aimlessly through the woods, intentionally staying out of La Push (no longer their territory) and away from the _vampires_ (he's still trying to make Leah stop with the leeches thing).

They're stuck in a silent trip through a patchy no man's land, and... it's _weird_.

Yeah. _Weird_.

Watching Jake imagine Bella naked...weird.

Watching Leah smash the mirror in her bathroom after Sam dumped her...weird.

Watching themselves through one another's eyes

...Oh yeah, _damn_ weird.

-x-

Finally, things come to a point. Meaning, in short, that the shit hits the fan.

Sam has a serious talking to with Jake about how exactly they're going to, well, avoid killing one another.

Leah sits Seth down and tries to explain how she's _suffocating_ here.

And, yeah, it's a great big whirligig of shitty.

_(_

"_Are you saying I don't belong here?"_

"_Do you really have to leave?"_

"_You bastard." _

"_There's only so much tension we can handle."_

"_I'll miss you." _

"_I've had enough of this."_

"_Bullshit. I'm out of here."_

"_Tell mom, okay?"_

_)_

-x-

Leah does head to college, to take her yoga classes and get a degree, but it's farther than expected. A lot farther.

Jake heads in the other direction entirely, going feral and resigning himself to getting in touch with his animal side –

– and then they end up on opposite sides of the country.

They lose touch with family, with Emily and Quil and Embry and Seth, and it's so much lonelier than they thought it would be.

And they maybe realize that escaping isn't all it's cut out to be. Maybe however far they get from Sam and Bella and _pain,_and _heartbreak_, it's never far enough.

So whatever their little... thing is, it's a _tentative_ thing at first.

But now they're Pack after all, and Jake is as stunned as he is relieved when he hears her wisecracking voice in his head.

_They're gonna throw me out of college if I keep losing my temper like this._

And if he doesn't see how hard it was, how randomly and suddenly _difficult_ it was for her to try and find his mind, it's all the better.

_What - you're showing them your ugly face right now?_

_Nah, I'm hiding out in the little girl's room on the fourth floor._

He sees it clearly, dingy toilets, grimy tiles, three lightbulbs and one half open stall door towering over her head. She's sitting against the wall, curled up and looking unusually tamed for the lithe, gray wolf she is right now.

_Ooh, Clearwater, brave. Real brave._

_Hey, I'm working on it, okay. Yoga's hasn't exactly turned into the greatest of successes._

If he could raise his eyebrow, he would.

_Oookay. You're even failing yoga?_

_No. _

And she's _not_ being defensive.

_It's just - Do you have any idea how stupid it looks trying to do Downward Facing Dog? Or Sun Salutations?_

His images pop simultaneously into her head. Her, dressed in a dog suit, barking loudly at the ground, superimposed over her, again, now with her hands thrown up in the air, crying "I salute you, Sun!"

_Yeah, a little._

_Not_ that _stupid, you _mutt_._

_-_x_-_

_It's like a cell phone call. _

That's their oh-so-profound analogy after a half-a-year (it's really been that long?) of their conversations, which have become the strange little anchors of their world, the borders and the boundaries of what they've made for themselves.

_But free._

_And with better reception._

_Even in bathrooms, right?_

_Shut it._

-x-

It's like a ritual, soon. Cloudy days, snowy days, and just _some_ days, she'll nip into a bathroom, and phase. And be aware that he's there, waiting. How does he know? Maybe just cuz he's Alpha. Maybe because – but she cuts that thought off right there. He's Alpha is just fine.

She starts to notice, though, when new memories start trickling in. He's phased out of his feral state. Living in a little town, breathing in the fresh, chilly air, smiling at the townsfolk.

_There's that Black fellow. _

_He's a lonely one, all right. _

Working in a woodshop. Giving out free toys, turtles and owls and bears, to small children. She even notices the short string of girls, a kiss here and there, a date.

They're all brown-eyed. All brown haired, with that (_stupid_) air of sweet innocence.

_Wow, Black, really working through that relationship, huh?_

_Yeah, Clearwater, because you're doing_ so _much better._

Well, he has a point. She hasn't had _anyone_ in her life, (_black haired and married, or otherwise_) but he's interested in watching all the same.

Watching as she hunkers down to study, lights up in a sudden grin at her roommates, lights up (in another sense) on an outdoor bench, tutors younger kids, experiments with hair dye -

_What the-?_

_Don't even ask._

_-_realizes that she can _do_ this, a degree in education isn't impossible after all, and (_once_) in a fit of royal drunkenness blares out her undying passion for Sting.

_I mean, he's sooo hoooot! He's soooo freaking hoooooot!_

Jake cracks up for a full three minutes at that, and she doesn't even threaten him.

_Funny_, she thinks, instead, _When did that happen?_

-x-

_Merry Christmas._

_...I'm not going to buy you anything._

_That makes two of us._

-x-

She tells him that she's going to go back for the wedding - and tries hard not to articulate how gross she finds the idea of being stepsister to _that leech._She knows (understands, at least) that Jake will probably never stop caring for (she thinks it with effort) _Bella_, and really, there's no point in getting stressed over it. _(Wow. Mellowed out much?)_

He agrees, says that it's been a while since he's gotten much but the occasional letter from the reservation or a phone call from Bella and EJ. He's really starting to miss his godson. _(Not Bella? Huh.)_

_Funny,_ they think_, When did that happen?_

-x-

Predictably, it's Seth who charges them both down for hugs. He's about a foot-and-half taller though, and he towers over Leah, so it's more _owww _than _awww_. Not that they're admitting anything.

"You guys! It's been so long! You won't believe what's been going on here!"

He proceeds to regale them with every single inconsequential occurrence that's gone on in the last two years as the rest of them slap Jake on the head and back, and call out sarcastic greetings to Leah.

If it was anyone else chattering on like that, Jake, or Leah, or both of them would have told Seth to can it, but, hey, it's comforting to know that even as Emily prepares for baby number 2 (Jake shoots a look at Leah's face) or EJ displays his impressive abilities in mind penetration (Leah hides her snort), some things never change.

-x-

Especially considering how much the two of them _have_.

Leah says less. Which means she's happier, maybe. She doesn't punch as hard, at least.

Her hair's longer, too. Well, enough, at least, for the raffish, red streaked pony she's pulled it into.

_(I see the hair dye worked out._

_I see you _didn't_. No gyms in Antarctica?)_

Jake is less angry. He's calmer, sillier, and surprisingly like Seth in his ability to ignore tension-filled rooms (like when he barges into Sam and Leah's first discussion after two years. For an _apple._)

And, obviously, the cold has killed his sense of style, because, of all things, he walks out of the airport wearing a freaking trench coat.

_(What the hell is that?_

_Don't be jealous, Lee.)_

-x-

The wedding (unsurprisingly) is an unqualified disaster.

The bride's family and the groom's family refuse to be in one room together, meaning the wedding is outdoors – in _winter_. Bella's extraordinarily stupid (but, in retrospect, completely characteristic) decision to invite her mother, stepfather, and high school friends adds to the widespread chaos by creating a third party of highly tense partygoers, except this group has no _idea_ why they're afraid for their lives.

His dearest grandmama's attendance also means that EJ, now at a mental age of about thirteen, is being forced to wear onesies, pretend to be a toddler and let out half sentences of baby talk while dragging along a bottle. Aside from the minor entertainment his glowering and insulted pride cause, there's very little that's funny about the wedding.

Emmett and Paul quickly destroy the fine china with an impromptu test of strength, Leah and Rosalie nearly kill each other at least five times, then content themselves with conspicuous provocations involving Esme's good silver and raw meat, Jake attacks Paul when Paul starts talking about how he finally scored on Jake's sister, Jasper passes out from exhaustion trying to keep WWIII at bay, and only Seth, Jake, Edward and Bella manage moderately civil encounters at all.

(_Hey, Edward._

_Seth._

_Crazy wedding, huh?_

_Tell me about it._

_-x-_

_Bells?_

_Jake! How have you been? We haven't heard from you in so long! How's Alaska treating you?_

_Pretty well. How's Forks?_

…_It's… been better._

_I figured._

_I'm tempted to drag EJ over here, but he'd probably die of embarrassment if he had to talk to you right now._

_Hah. Yeah. Tell him the booties really… complete his look._)

-x-

By day three, random groups of relatives are vanishing in an attempt to reduce the tension. The vampires manage to convince the other guests that they're having family outings, but only the La Push wolves go out so that Jake and Leah don't get torn to bits.

Which is all well and good, until Bella's mom becomes convinced that they're dating one another.

Not so well and good.

Especially because it fast becomes everybody's favorite way of pissing Leah off. And she can only take so many Beta/bottom jokes before she cracks.

-x-

(_We need to get out of here._

_What?_

_We _need _to _get out_. Or I'm going to kill someone, and mom's gonna be pissed._

_Is little LeeLee afraid of her mommy?_

_Don't push me, asshole._)

-x-

It's a testament to how angry she is that the first thing she does once she's shredded her dress by phasing

_That's gonna be hard to replace._

_Shut up._

is tear halfway through the nearest tree.

_You really are angry, aren't you?_

_Shut _up_._

The tree falls with a misleadingly soft _whumpf. _She turns to him

_I need to run._

Accompanied by whirling images of trees, and dirt, and moon, and_ poundpoundpoundfreefreefree._

A pause.

_Race ya._

-x-

The so-called race speedily turns into Let's-see-who-can-cause-the-most-destruction-by-cracking-tree-branches, especially since they have no idea where the race is supposed to end.

They dash off in different directions, in an admittedly ridiculous attempt to fool one another since

_You …know I can still see you._

_Have we discussed _shut up?

-x-

He crashes into her first, which knocks them both over. For a few minutes, everything is just angry snarls and broken off curse words.

_You dipshit, are you blind?_

_Well, what the hell were you doing there?_

_I was _looking around, _unlike someone._

_Hey!_

And all of a sudden it turns into a playful squabble. Leah nips at Jake's tail and charges off with him tearing after her.

_Gain some weight, LeeLee? You've slowed down._

_I'm still running circles around _you_._

-x-

So when did it stop being a game?

-x-

It's a surprisingly equal fight (Because Jake's strong and Leah's fast), and when Jake wins, it's with a cheap move, grabbing Leah's tail between his teeth and yanking (_hard_), which sends both of them tumbling head over heels.

Leah lands on her back with a grunt, Jake leaps on top with a growl. For ten seconds of surprise (read: _silence_) they find that everything, all of a sudden, is much too _small _again, too close, too personal – it's _weird_, because here they are again, seeing stuff they don't want to – and then Leah throws out a fierce

_Bastard_

And Jake hisses

_Bitch_

And it, whatever it is, that keeps barging in the middle like this, is over again.

-x-

Watching Leah trying on her dress for the wedding. _(biting her lip)_

Watching Jake with one of the brown-haired girls, drumming with his fork. _(bored, bored, bored)_

Watching Leah's roommate poke her and ask, "Well, who is he?" _(and watching her face before that)_

Watching Jake frowning at his bloody knuckles, and Seth asking, "So can I break your arm, too, or are you and Leah still not having sex?" _(and watching him say nothing)_

And watching, watching, watching.

-x-

They retreat to opposite ends of their field to change. Leah yanks on her underwear and is halfway into a pair of sweats before she speaks up.

"...So," she says at last, with a false mix of casualness and bravado, "Are we _ever _going to fuck, Jacob?"

He turns around, shirt half on, one eyebrow up in a bemused frown, and then shrugs before facing his tree again,

"Thought you'd never ask."

-x-

_Reviewers get to name Jake and Leah's kickass werewolf babies._


End file.
